tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5893934976046813531.post4290137173086968991..comments2023-03-29T05:10:45.733-07:00Comments on After Matilda: Things Parents Should Never Have to DoMaddiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15665878580598197034noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5893934976046813531.post-19330745832591714652010-01-27T12:57:47.970-08:002010-01-27T12:57:47.970-08:00it's so hard, having to walk on this side of t...it's so hard, having to walk on this side of the universe. i don't think anyone can fathom what it is to carry and birth a child, and then watch them die. that's why they don't understand. it is so awful, so terrifying that they look away. i wonder sometimes what i would have done as an onlooker had i never walked in this world. i don't know. i can't even relate anymore to that innocense. it is all so difficult and wrong. your first one made me think of when my daughter was dying, and a hospital staffer came in to ask if we had a plot ready. i looked at her and said, "i am 28 years old, why on earth would i have a cemetery plot?" there are so many things we are forced to deal with that are just so unfair. i am sorry that matilda is not here with you. i love her name.Once A Motherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15974149780531831971noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5893934976046813531.post-70035706830427119902010-01-27T01:28:40.658-08:002010-01-27T01:28:40.658-08:00There's one photo of me and Matilda Catherine ...There's one photo of me and Matilda Catherine that really sums that up. I think it was just after they'd put her in my arms - I'm looking at the camera with a big smile on my face. But there's also tears running down my checks and it's obvious I've been crying for hours. I like the photos where we're looking her and you can't really see our faces better. You can just see the pain in the other ones.Maddiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15665878580598197034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5893934976046813531.post-52418776268608816402010-01-27T00:38:32.835-08:002010-01-27T00:38:32.835-08:00Noone should ever have to go through any of these....Noone should ever have to go through any of these.<br /><br />For me, it was hearing 'I'm going to stop there' at an unscheduled scan. It was obvious from that what had happened, but I still thought it couldn't be possible. It couldn't have happened to me. Or my baby.<br /><br />I would be able to cope with any amount of pain if I knew that next time, it will be OK. but I don't know anything, and that's terrifying.Bethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12523875341438470968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5893934976046813531.post-40254533101738982702010-01-26T23:53:08.813-08:002010-01-26T23:53:08.813-08:00I wish that nobody ever had to go through any of t...I wish that nobody ever had to go through any of these things. I'm so, so sorry. For myself, I find number three on your list particularly painful. I was so lost in love and wonder when I finally got to hold my daughter that it was a shock to realise that nothing had changed, that she was still dying.<br />It's difficult when others question why you are still so upset after 'all this time' but they don't understand. xoCatherine Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01618295389400457254noreply@blogger.com