He asked me a couple of questions that made me realise how different I feel to the person I was before this. He asked if I thought of myself as anxious and I said, I do now but I never would have before. Before this I had a couple of anxious friends that I used to sometimes think 'it must be hard being that anxious all the time'. And now I'm that person. He also asked if I thought of myself as a sensitive person and again, before I didn't and now I do. I know this is going to affect me forever but I wonder if my personality will go back to basically the same as before eventually? I imagine it will but at the moment that person just seems so far away from who I am now.
I also talked to him about how withdrawn I am. I stay home mostly and this is what worries my husband most. I've always been an extremely social person and happy in a crowd of loud people. The idea of being in a crowd of people make me feel awful now. He said that I should probably start making a bit more effort to get out and see close friends because the longer I withdraw for the harder it will get to eventually get back out there. I think the reason I withdraw is because then I don't expose myself to the chance of having people say 'helpful' things to me that actually hurt. Or just having strangers ask questions they have no idea could hurt - 'have you got kids?'.
He wants to see me again in 3 weeks to make sure my mood is improving rather than spiralling downwards.